National Eating Disorder Awareness Week

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week

Ack! I took a social media break and missed posting for National Eating Disorder Awareness Week!

Better late than never.

Here are blog posts from April 2017 explaining my rocky road riddled with anxiety, depression, and disordered eating. The writing is horrendous, God has grown me leaps and bounds spiritually since 2017, but I still feel this part of my life will help someone else know that they are not alone and there is help and hope.


The Novel

The Novel

Good afternoon.

A sharp turn from my past few posts, here is an update on my book!

As you may or may not know, I wrote a novel for middle-grade readers last year. I can’t wait to share the name and everything about it with you but now is just not that time. Soon!

Writing the book was pretty humbling. In a year, I wrote the book twice. I thought the first version was brilliant, took the summer off of writing, then revisited the manuscript again to see that is was an absolute atrocity. Haha! This is how I learned that the best thing to do when finishing a novel is to leave it alone. Leave it alone for weeks or months so that you can come back to it with fresh eyes.

So while the story was terrible on paper at the time, in my head it was still just as lovely as when it fell into my mind. Even more lovely! So I decided to rewrite it completely. The first version was in third-person (Alice went to Wonderland.) The rewrite is in first (I went to Wonderland.) I’ve blogged here for five years now in first-person. It comes much more naturally to me. I ended up changing the title and the names of many characters. I have to tell you, writing this fantasy was a fantasy. Both times I wrote the book was such a mental vacation; a place I went hours a day to escape the real world and hide in an imaginary and magical one.

I follow many fiction writers that I have great respect for. I’ve heard almost all of them say that once you finish your first novel, not to start working on the sequel. You don’t know what will happen with the first so it is best to begin working on a different project completely. I can’t do it. I have this series planned; it’s in my head. Who in world can write another story when there is a story in their heart screaming to be written?

Whoever they are they have much more talent than me.

The Prettiest Thorn

The Prettiest Thorn

Isn’t pride the prettiest little thorn in the side?

We know it’s destruction.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:12

Where there is strife, there is pride, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. Proverbs 13:10

Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18

Yet, our society has come to indulge and revel in it. We work and spend and show and tell all to stroke our pretty thorn.

But at the end of the day, at the end of our life, what will have mattered? When we are face to face with a God who knows our true hearts, our true character, the true motivations of our works. What will He know of us?

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.  Micah 6:8

If we were wise we would consider this. Likely, if we seek a God who knows our true heart, He will likely take pleasure in giving us a new one. A good one.

And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:26

And I bet if we sought a God who gave us a new heart, we would notice the thorn as much.

Peace and Joy Q & A

Peace and Joy Q & A

peace and joy.png

Good morning!

Here is a Q & A for those of you who have been Christians for some time and have yet to understand when or how we receive peace and joy from Jesus. I called myself a Christian for a long time before I understood so I am passing this along to you because there is no greater peace and joy than that from Christ…but you have to actually receive it. I urge you to be honest with yourselves as to if you truly are experiencing the peace of Christ. If not, it’s ok, read on.

Q. When does peace actually come to the person who believes in Christ?

A. I used to think that just believing that Christ died for my sins was “believing in Christ” but it’s actually the complete understanding of what He has done for me. Once you understand this, the peace and joy come!

Q. What is it that Christ actually did for me?

A. To understand this fully, you have to understand your heart. The heart is desperately sick. We have to fully understand our plight before we can fully understand how God rescued us from it.

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?  Jeremiah 17:9

You don’t have to take my word for it. You should take the Bible’s word for it, but even if you don’t do that, take a moment and ask God to reveal to you your sin. It may not be right after you pray the prayer, but He will. You will be disgusted and you will be thankful He has saved us.

Q. How do I gain peace from knowing that I am terrible? 

A. Once God opens your eyes to your issues, a number of things happen. You are so thankful that the God of the Universe took time to show you the truth. You are so thankful that He came to earth and took the punishment that you now know you deserve. You are at peace with God.

Again, this isn’t something that someone can convince you of. You must take time to get alone with God and ask Him to open your eyes and increase your faith. Be brave.

Q. Where does joy come in? 

A.  What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
     Romans 8:31

God has chosen to reveal His truths to you. You prayed, and He answered. You have found your purpose in life that has eternal benefits. If that doesn’t bring you joy, again, ask God to show you His truth. He will.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  Matthew 7:7

Q. Why would someone not ask God to open their eyes?

A. Because they want to remain blind. This may seem strange but it’s true. Our minds can’t imagine that what we aren’t desiring could actually be better. We naturally desire the things of this world. We must pray and ask God to change us even though we currently have these worldly desires.

When I was pregnant with Anna, I did NOT want a girl (I know, terrible. I blame hormones!) I wanted another boy. I couldn’t imagine how having a girl was going to work out because I only knew how great having a boy was. But now I have a girl and she is absolutely wonderful! Of course, she is! I can’t believe I ever thought it would be otherwise. But I couldn’t see it before. We must believe in things that haven’t been shown to us yet. We must want things that we don’t want yet. ASK!

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.  Romans 8:5

Q. So do I just wait for godly thoughts to pop into my head and my heart to suddenly be pure?

A. No.

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  Matthew 6:33

Why would God have left a Bible for us if He didn’t want us to read it? God’s word is powerful and He reveals Himself through it. Ask…and then SEEK Him in His word!

For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12 

Then pray. But get serious. Be reverent. He is God.

He fulfills the desires of those who fear Him; He hears their cry and saves them.
Psalm 145:19

Do you even fear God? Is He even hearing your prayers?

Q. How in the world does all of this bring peace and joy? Find out how terrible I am? Give up all my wants? Be fearful of God?

A. I’m telling you, it really is like me not knowing that I was going to like having a girl. Just ask, seek, and knock and you will understand. What do you have to lose? What do you have to gain?

Seeking peace and joy? Ask God to open your eyes, Seek Him through His word. Knock. The door will be opened. I have full confidence in this.

Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all.  2 Thessalonians 3:15






VIDEO: Explanation of the Drastic Change in 2017, Postpartum Anxiety/OCD, and Middle-Grade Fantasy Fiction

VIDEO: Explanation of the Drastic Change in 2017, Postpartum Anxiety/OCD, and Middle-Grade Fantasy Fiction

Hi Peaches!

Today’s video is different than usual. I just want to give a video explanation of why this is no longer a fitness blog, how that all happened, and how a fiction novel was born. Click the title to watch!

Hope you all are well and blessings to you!


VIDEO: Explanation of the Drastic Change in 2017, Postpartum Anxiety/OCD, and Middle-Grade Fantasy Fiction