Any journalers out there? I LOVE to journal. When I am blogging, I don’t journal my thoughts that much because God for whatever reason made me an open book. Any poor unsuspecting soul from Jason to my grocery cashier to all of you, are unfortunately subject to my thoughts, feelings, desires, struggles, and weirdisms. I don’t know why this is. This has done me well at times and absolutely horrendously at times. Anyway, when I am blogging I don’t journal much because I am already sharing much of my life but I do journal notes from my Bible reading, my prayers, and I even have a journal of letters to Ryan and Anna telling them the things I have learned so far in this crazy thing called life.
I rarely go back and read the journals but yesterday Jason found one from 2009. It was a horrific time in my life. I was leaving my ex-husband, I had completely given up on God, I had a job that required me to be extremely thin and my eating disorder was the worst it ever had been. Looking at those pages and remembering all of the pain and chaos, I am so grateful to God for His mercy on me. In my time of need, I did not run to Him but instead shook my fist at Him and tried to handle it all myself which of course ended in years of misery. I was not good to him yet He was beyond good to me! Not only did He keep me alive through that traumatic time while I was spitting in His face, but He has blessed me with a loving husband and two beautiful kids to serve. The time came when I realized how real God actually was and I had wronged Him greatly. I was so scared. But again, He gave me undeserved love. He sent Christ to be punished for my iniquities. I didn’t have to pay for the terrible things I had done because Christ paid for them instead.
But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.
That is so unfair, isn’t it? But I cannot tell you how grateful I am to Christ for what He did on the cross for me! Praise you, Lord. Praise you, Lord!
The Bible says that whoever is forgiven of much, loves much. I can tell you that is a thousand times true. I can’t fathom the love of God. But it is real and He gives it abundantly!
Who loves like God? Who not only holds back an angry response but bestows the offender with gifts!
God loves like this so we need to at least put forth the effort to love like this.
But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. 1 Peter 2:20-21
Anyone? Have you been forgiven much? Do you love much? Do you forgive much? Do you bless much?