It’s been a while since I have done an update on my anxiety/OCD journey. Here’s the latest! Click the Title to view the video.
It’s been a while since I have done an update on my anxiety/OCD journey. Here’s the latest! Click the Title to view the video.
If you are a Christian who suffers from anxiety, you have more than likely been sent Matthew 6:25 (Do not worry about your life…) If you are like me, and only ended up feeling worse after reading it, join me in reading on in Matthew 6 to the verse below it that we MUST read first.
When doing research for these posts, I came across this article.
The article summarizes and lists the symptoms for OCD. As I read through the symptoms, I thought about how strange recovery actually is even though wonderful at the same time. Though our thoughts eventually become so torturous we have no choice but to seek help, for much of our life, the obsessions and compulsions aren’t torturous and are just our world. When our eyes are opened to reality, it can be uncomfortable, even alarming. The realization that what we have been thinking and feeling for so long is not reality is no doubt a jostling experience. So today, for those you who are experiencing this right now, here is the beauty for the ashes.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
Beauty for Ashes:
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
2 Corinthians 10:5
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees. Psalm 119:71
Friends, whether you are in the struggle or struggling with the time lost from it, there is good in it all. The time was actually not lost at all, you were being refined. Today, reflect on the beauty that has come from the ashes.
If there is one thing that has been burned into my mind throughout my crazy OCD journey it is this…
There is peace in the pasture.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.[a]
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness[b]
for his name’s sake.
Us humans, we love to try to be the shepherd right? Who doesn’t want to be in charge and not have to answer to anyone? Let me tell you who. You.
Think of a shepherd with his sheep in the pasture. The sheep have everything they need. They have food and water, there is a fence to keep them safe. They have everything they need because of their shepherd who watches over them.
“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. John 10:11
Jesus is our good Shepherd. We are His sheep. If you are having a hard time accepting that, I’m telling you, there is NO peace in trying to be your own shepherd. You will find peace as a sheep. And it really is a peace that surpasses all understanding.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7
What is keeping you from submitting? Is it pride? You just want things your way? Friend, here’s your sign, you’re doing yourself in. Is it fear? Are you afraid that if you submit you will not enjoy God’s will? I thought that too! But you can’t let that hold you back. Seriously. No matter what it is. Remember Abraham.
Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. Genesis 22:1
Just do it. Just call to God and say “Here I am!”
Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.’ Jeremiah 33:3
Today, just surrender it all. Be a sheep. There is peace in the pasture.
I hope you all are well, but if you aren’t maybe today’s anxiety post will help a bit.
If you suffer from anxiety attacks or panic attacks, today’s post is for you!
First, did you know there is a difference between the two?
Anxiety attacks are provoked by stressors and are short lived. Like if you think someone is in your house at night. As you are anxiously waiting for noises and footsteps your anxiety builds and builds and results in a short bout of racing heartbeat, shortness of breath, and dizziness. (Not a full list of symptoms.)
Panic attacks, on the other hand, are unprovoked and can occur randomly. I would get them grocery shopping, in church, walking the dog, driving down the street, anywhere! Seemingly out of nowhere, sudden symptoms of dizziness, nausea, chest pain, shortness of breath, and racing heart hit like a ton of bricks. (Not a full list of symptoms).
It is important to learn the difference between the two because if you are like me and have experienced a panic attack thinking it was an anxiety attack, the fact that it is lasting a really long time only adds to the panic!
Grounding techniques are things that you can do when symptoms occur to bring you back into reality. When we are anxious, we live in our minds, not in reality. As real as the symptoms are, they are all stemming from your mind. When talking with my doctor about my symptoms, I told him that I was having real shortness of breath, real dizziness to the point of having to lay on the ground. I was having real acid reflux and brain fog, and real tremors so there had to be something wrong with me like a disease or something horrible. He told me when someone is suffering from an anxiety disorder, the symptoms are real. The anxiety causes real headaches, real nausea, everything. But the symptoms are coming from the anxiety, not cancer or hypoglycemia, or heart failure, or whatever it may be that we have self-diagnosed ourselves with during our obsessed Googling.
If you are too the point where you are having anxiety or panic attacks frequently, please read last week’s post, The Blessing of Medication. Do not be afraid to accept the help we have available to us.
Whether you are on medication or not, or even if you have an anxiety disorder or not, these techniques are good to know. Everyone has anxiety at some point in their life and it’s helpful to how to get out of our own heads. These techniques are easy but make a huge difference.
My post on the Five Thinking Hats Technique is still my most popular one to date! This is a great way to force your mind back into the here and now. Here’s how to do it.
Wherever you are at the moment…
Asking ourselves simple questions is another great to bring our minds out of the whirl.
Trace your hand on a sheet of paper. Write the five senses on each finger. Then for each of the five senses, identify something safe and comforting for each one. For example, the pinky finger represents sound. The waves rolling in at the beach. Pointer finger represents feel. Warm sheets from the dryer.
That was calming even typing that. 🙂
While you could certainly do Five Thinking Hats and Asking Questions in Public, here are some other things that you can do when you are not at home.
I hope you find some of these helpful! And there are certainly more grounding techniques out there. Do you have any others that you use? Please share! Let’s all help one another.
To medicate or to not medicate, that is the question.
Today I want to discuss the topic of medication for anxiety/depression/OCD to hopefully help those of you struggling with this hard decision.
*I am not a doctor. I am just someone who God brought through debilitating OCD with the blessing of counseling and medication. I am sharing my experience for those of you who are either afraid of medication or have fallen victim to the stigma of it.
First, let’s talk about why the decision to take antidepressants is such a hard one to make. One big reason is the stigma given by the ignorant. People have a really hard time identifying with things they haven’t experienced and often times dangerously discredit them. Another reason is that OCD is so darn deceiving making us who suffer from it think we don’t need medication. I refused to take medicine for far too long because I figured “I thought myself into this. I can think myself out.” I believed this because my disorder did not make itself known until I experienced hormonal changes and then trauma in my life. Unaware that hormones played a role (or that I even had OCD for that matter) I believed it was the trauma that caused the intrusive thoughts and feelings so I could definitely just get counseling, talk it through, and eventually they would go away. When they didn’t, it was really helpful to learn that the disorder is genetic. The OCD was there my whole life and the traumas and hormonal changes only caused “flare-ups”. These genetic predispositions are the same ones that keep the alcoholic coming back to the bottle when someone else can have one drink, or why the person who eats right and exercises every day dies at forty of cancer while the smoker lives to ninety.
I am a Christian and I have OCD. I want you to know that you can be a Christian, love the Lord your God, and still suffer from mental illness. This doesn’t mean that your heart is in the wrong place, but it does mean that it is time to draw more near to the Lord than ever.
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
This is a fallen world. God has so graciously saved us from death by sending His son in our place. But here, we are being sanctified. Christ has not only saved us from the grave but also refines us to be more like Him! Refinement is not a pleasant experience, guys.
And I will put this third into the fire, and refine them as one refines silver, and test them as gold is tested. They will call upon my name, and I will answer them. I will say, ‘They are my people’; and they will say, ‘The LORD is my God.’” Zechariah 13:9
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.
1 Peter 5:10
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4
Most of us consider diseases, birth defects, and disabilities trials but for some reason have a hard time even crediting mental illness as an actual problem though suicide is the leading cause of death in the U.S. And in case you read the previous sentence and think this it is just a western issue, it’s not. We are just the most open about it. Look it up.
When we have a loved one who has cancer, we thank God for chemotherapy and we pray that He heals them through it. When a loved one has a heart condition, we thank the Lord for doctors and surgery and stints. Sure, God can certainly heal miraculously and sometimes does but usually, He draws it out for a purpose.
No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields a peaceful harvest of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11
If you read this blog, you know I can attest to this. No, I did not enjoy going through the torture of mental illness but I can without a doubt say that if I hadn’t suffered for the duration that I did, I would not be as thankful for Christ as I am, I would not feel as loved by God as I do, and I would not have nearly as much knowledge about OCD to help others who are suffering. The LORD is my God.
Bottom line, if you are being torturously attacked by your mind, I am here to tell you that medication, my friends, is a blessing from the Lord and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.
Now onto what medication will and won’t do for you.
You can read in this post and this post about the nature of OCD. In short, all people, OCD or not, have weird thoughts that sporadically pop into our brains. The difference for the OCD sufferer is that there is an intense fear response that arises afterward “warning” us that we need to pay attention to them when we really don’t. For me, medication dramatically lessened these feelings of fear so that I could finally take my thoughts captive and examine them.
If you have OCD and only take medication without receiving any therapy, you will likely not get better. For me and many others, it is the mix of medication and therapy that led to success. My counselor says you can’t run a race without your shoes. Medication is your shoes. It brings you to a point where you can actually do the work toward lasting success.
It wasn’t until my chemical imbalance was balanced that I realized how many things were affected by OCD.
Not a bad thing! And please don’t stop reading. The next one will be even better news. I know this sounds really terrible for those of you who are currently being tortured by your thoughts but I promise it’s not. Remember, it’s your response to the thoughts that is the issue here. Everyone has strange thoughts but not everyone has loud warnings in their minds begging them to pay attention. If the thoughts weren’t scary, they wouldn’t be scary, would they? But read on!
Medication will drastically quiet the noise. The incessant intrusive thoughts that beat their way through your brain day in and day out will be much less intense. Thank God for antidepressants.
Just as with most medications, antidepressants are no different. For me, the good FAR outweighed the bad. It is just important to keep in mind that it takes these drugs a few good weeks for the therapeutic benefits to kick in so try your best to be patient.
I hope you are well but if you aren’t please do not be afraid to take the help that is available to us. If you are currently suffering, please know that peace is so very possible. Do not let a stigma keep you from it.
Any brave souls want to share their medication before and after stories? 🙂
It’s Friday! In case you are just tuning in, Friday’s around here are all about anxiety relief. Today’s post is for EVERYONE. Those struggling with extreme anxiety, depression, OCD, eating disorders, everyone mentally ill (not as bad as it sounds.) In today’s post, I am discussing YOUR PART in the journey to peace.
If you have been reading this blog any length of time you know that my war cry is to GET HELP. You can click on the Anxious? tab above and probably any post you choose will be urging you to get medical help for your mental illness.
But it is crucial that you know that you have A LOT of work to do on your end. You can’t just go in for an hour appointment once a week or so and expect to get better. A therapist is crucial but their job is to educate and guide you in your journey. Do not underestimate the importance of this. Knowledge really is power and we are not meant to go it alone. I thank the Lord so much for doctors, therapists, and medication. They are truly blessings to all of us.
But here are three things that you must do to make sure that getting help actually helps.
I struggled with anorexia, bulimia, anxiety, depression, and OCD for close twenty years. Geez, when I type it all out like that I was quite the mess. Haha! In those twenty years, I saw five different therapists. One when I was fifteen. One when I was eighteen. One when I was twenty-two. Then two in my thirties. I tried one but then switched to another that was a better fit for me.
So why did most of those bouts of therapy end up unsuccessful? Not because of the therapist. Because of me! It wasn’t until my thirties that I finally wanted to get better. I know that is hurtful to some of you because it was hurtful to me when I heard it back then. But it was true nonetheless. I had so many fears of what would happen when I let go of my disorders. I had no idea what was on the other side. Until you get to the point that you are so sick and tired of living the way that you have been and decide that you will take whatever is next no matter what it is, you don’t want to get better.
Mother’s sending your daughter’s to therapy because you are terrified you will lose them, know that it isn’t a waste of time and money. Many of the things they hear will stick and be applied later on. But do not be discouraged if the therapy is not effective at this time. Because right now, you are the one that wants her better. Don’t give up. Just keep praying that you will both have the same desires soon.
This is crucial. You must tell the therapist what is going in order for them to be able to help you. I think of the times that I went in for a session when I was younger. The therapist would ask “How are you?”, I would say “fine” even though obviously I wasn’t or else I wouldn’t be there. I guess I just expected her to draw my problem out of my head. That’s pretty ridiculous, right? We can’t expect them to help us with things that they don’t even know we are struggling with!
Many times the reason it is so difficult to tell them everything that is going on is because we are embarrassed. When it comes to mental illnesses, things get WEIRD. Most of us experience a lot of shame and are embarrassed to share. Please, let me put your mind at ease. You are not alone my friend. Even if your therapist hasn’t heard your particular weirdism (my friend Sarah’s term), they either have heard something similar or will in the not so distant future. But most likely that have heard your issues before. Really. I need to make a post of a bunch of the weird things that my brain sent my way throughout those twenty years. I’m sure you would at least find it highly entertaining if it didn’t make you feel better about opening up in your sessions. Actually, I just shared one of my weirdisms the other day in this post! Check it out! I was obsessed with the apocalypse. 🙂
Every therapist I saw gave me action steps to do until the next time I came to see them. Until my thirties, I did not give priority to them and therefore it wasn’t until my thirties that the therapy helped. DO THESE. We are all busy. We have many commitments. In my last post, I made a point to stress what we should actually be committing to. This is your wellbeing. DO THE ACTION STEPS.
I hope you all are well but if you aren’t, you are definitely not alone. There is help to be found and hope to be had. Please do not hesitate to ask me to pray for your journey. I would love to and promise I will!
Blessings and peace to you all,